I always wonder how do (and I’m sure there could be) Simmers play with queer Sims, outside just gay and bi Sims? How do transition or play suppose ‘transgender Sims of a assign sex? What about non-binary and genderfluid Sims? Aro-ace? Would demisexuals be Sims with very high chemistry? What distinguish (if they exist) you do for pansexual and bi Sims? Do you have a Pan Sim date anyone of very dinstict looking Sim that have no gender look, or you have them date supernatural Sims (tbh, it would even be a cool element as its own lifestatesexuality hehe)?

I’’m curious to hear your playstyle experience and incorperation

Surprisingly, I've rarely had any trans or nonbinary sims, though that's likely to change quite soon. I do have the transgendering potions in my game (cannot recall who made them at the moment) but I haven't actually used them yet.
When it does happen, it's sort of more like a sense. I let my sims tell me things (though not as much as AndrewGloria does, and I envy his open communication with his sims!) and sometimes a "male" sim will tell me "hey, I'm a girl" or suchlike. And there was once when a baby was born that I got a very strong sense that they were nonbinary, though I didn't play the hood past their toddler stage. (I should recreate that hood actually, it was a fun story.)
I think because right now I've been only playing challenges and setups, there's been less wiggle room, but I plan to relax a bit more when I go back to certain households. Sexuality is simply determined by who the sim flirts with (and has chemistry with) first--often in my bigger neighborhoods that means the friends they bring home on the bus as teenagers. I'll have my sim check them out and if they click, there you go!
I think ultimately though it would take a lot of attention to create sims of more complicated genders. It's an amount of attention I used to give, but haven't for a while. I guess I need to get back into that : )

I haven't really. I play gay/bi sims, but I've never really had interest in going more complicated. My sim world is enough of a utopia that I imagine noone getting born into the 'wrong' gender and asexual etc. are hard to play, because sims like woohoo. XD

Don't we all.

Well I'm actually asexual in RL lol.

Fair enough, didn't mean any offence, was just making light of it.

If anyone is the weird one here, it is me. The straight guy playing with his virtual dollhouse (sims).

I'm also asexual. I can't say I've ever had any asexual or queer sims.

With queer sims I can't say I've ever felt the need. I don't think I treat my sims all that differently based on their gender. I guess it might sound kind of transphobic since they're not included, but I also don't think I'd feel right playing around with something like that. Like I'd be constantly second guessing myself wondering if it was ok to have a trans sim perform just about any action even though its a single player game.

Despite being asexual I haven't had any in the game, since I can't control whether or not they roll woohoo. I also don't think it would make a huge difference even if I did. I myself am married to a heterosexual man and I enjoy the emotional closeness of cuddling and kissing. Honestly, my sims rarely woohoo anyway outside of procreation and romance sims being romance sims.

I do have one sim who I've been feeling like might be treated as aro-ace because even though she's gorgeous (imo) I see her as adventurous and reclusive. Her friendship with Cassandra Goth's son feels platonic and I just don't see the married life being for her. Usually I'll make my sims a partner if there isn't anyone they click with, but I might not do it in this case and I'll just play the super long game and if she doesn't find anyone that's ok. I might be biased on this last point, but I also don't think that she would even have to be aroace to be totally happy as a bachelorette with no sex life.

I mostly just take sims as they are, so unless I'd have a very strong feeling otherwise they are the gender the game treats them as, and whether they're cis or trans is none of my business, lol. I did have a female sim once who I thought of as non-binary during her childhood and teenage years, but from adulthood and onwards I saw her as a woman, so I've retroactively started thinking of her as a trans woman who started out identifying as non-binary before realising she was a woman. Her name was Zelda, which I guess could have been her birthname that she kept if her mother tried naming her after the green guy from Legend of Zelda and got it wrong but also kinda right :D

I have had some sims who just never showed any interest in romance and wohoo (including the blond guy in my profile picture). And some I guess could be interpreted as asexual but not aromantic.

I'm curious what you mean by that! /lh
As the maker of the mod to let toddlers and kids wear all clothes regardless of gender (and I would have loved to do it for other ages if it had been possible) I don't tend to treat my sims differently regarding gender either. For one reason or another basically all my toddlers age up into kids with skirts, and I guess it's just that skirts are fun.

My self-Sim is aro-ace. I also decided to play Delilah O'Feefe (from Académie Le Tour) as aro-ace.

Due to a certain quirk if you extract her to Body Shop, in my current neighbourhood I decided to roleplay Jodie Larson as transgender. The only real changes is that she has a custom memory (added by @kestrellyn's gender change potions) and an RCC toggle so she can't get pregnant.

My previous hood had a transgender waitress because of a glitch where the SDSC didn't properly generate.

The good thing about sims is that they don't care about genderising or sexualising things. There is only one thing in the whole game, unrelated to reproduction, that male sims can do and females can't. Pee standing up. XD

Sims also don't care what sexual orientation you are or how you dress, what you like to play with, or whether you're 'traditionally' masculine or feminine.

Maybe that's the real reason that I don't have trans sims. There's no reason to care about what gender you are, because it doesn't affect a sim's life in any way unless they want to procreate.

Well, that doesn't have to be a limit either, there are mods that will allow pregnancy in any case - so all can be happy. :-).

There's nothing negatively weird about being a straight cis man playing with a virtual dollhouse. It's in fact a sign that you're secure enough to admit what you want to do, despite the present tendency to make gender into a minefield paved with razor wire. If boys didn't want to play with dolls, there wouldn't be so much effort put into belittling them for it and rebranding certain dolls as "action figures" to remove the feminine stigma of playing with dolls in order to profit off the desire. When simple pleasures are defined out of your life, becoming "weird" to get them back is a very healthy thing.

I've downloaded the transition potions but haven't used them. I've just never had a sim whom I interpreted as rejecting their physical form enough for that, probably because I personally feel completely congruent with my body to a degree few people seem to - if I want to do something it's automatically feminine get away from me with your arbitrary lists. So intraself conflict on that score is not something I'm likely to project onto a sim spontaneously.

I do, however, download a lot of "feminine" male clothes and "masculine" female clothes so anybody can butch or femme it up who wants to. Chester Gieke of Turpitudia (where everyone is bisexual and has a Romance secondary) is nonbinary and routinely wears dresses. Several people in Eden's Land dress butch or femme as seems to suit them, without it actively affecting their sexual behavior. In fact the butchest girl in the place, with a Fortune aspiration, was far more proactive about getting a husband than her femme Family sister was. In Eden's Land I assigned different gender norms to each founding household, but I've been stuck in the gender binary for sixty years and it's not easy, in the zone of gameplay, to experiment with that with this particular toy.

The problem with dressing sims against modern Western gender norms is that it's nearly impossible to find crossgendered clothing that isn't either formal or everyday and adult at the level of CC hunt I'm willing to undertake. I have a limited amount of nightwear and outerwear for adults, none for elders, and the only ones for teens are a couple that Aegagropilon made me years ago for a specific teen sim. It's also much easier to find femme clothing and hairstyles for men than butch ones for women. My butches wear a lot of Boyfriend Jeans and overalls and have a couple of go-to haircuts.

You've gotten to the heart of it I think, Peni. Gender, much like money and time, is entirely made up within society, and while that doesn't make it not real, it does mean that since each player's Sim world is its own society that abides by that player's rules, it's going to be a little bit different for everyone, and different from real life.
I will say, though, that being trans doesn't have to be about dysphoria. It can be just as much about the way a Sim wants to enjoy their own life, like your Chester.

I'm a bisexual trans man and I know of the potions and still haven't downloaded them, because i'm afraid i'll somehow mess up and blow up my game lol. I always worry before doing something yet I have plenty of mods and cc and sometimes fix stuff (basics like household name) in SimPE.

I have spreadsheets for every household so I have it written down in them if a sim is trans or nonbinary, but do I always gender them right on my simblr? No. Nonbinary sims are especially hard because unlike a trans girl in a dress for example they look like any other sim and then I forget. It has their sexualities listed to and I use ACR and just the basic straight/gay/bi. I often roll to determine a sims sexuality and give it an equal chance since I also have same-sex pregnancy it doesn't matter, they can all have kids! Because it's a game it doesn't have to be realistic to me.

CC clothes for trans sims though is very hard to find. I really should see about those transition potions.

For some weird reason male pregnancy is a no go for me ... unless it's from the aliens. Go figure lol.



I know that feeling. That's why I started making my own.

If you upload them, I'll download them!

At times, I wish Sims games were not look down upon, as a male and gay simmer people are confused as I used to mention The Sims as the only game I play. One guy (who's into guys ironically) called me being a femme just so I told them I play Sims. However, I agree with you.

Also, surprised there is my asexual folk tribe here Happy to hear I'm not alone

Actually, The Sims is very much a secret.

Outside of this forum, almost nobody[1] knows I play the Sims. It's my dirty little secret. There is not a single mention of the sims on my other profiles and steam.

If anyone asks, I'm playing GTA.

[1] One person on Steam found out because she mentioned TS4 and I accidentally started saying it was a bad game and TS2 was better etc, etc. Accidentally outed myself there.

You know seeing straight cis men playing Sims makes my trans man ass feel better to be honest. People say it's a "dollhouse game for girls" and I know it's dumb but dysphoria is a jerk. But I love Sims too much to ever stop. 🥰

I been playing since TS1... so, I don't think I'll be stopping any time soon.

There are cis men playing TS, we just don't admit to it.

For my sims: Pascal Curious is ace/aro. He has never rolled a want to interact romantically with anyone (unless persistent wants to "get abducted by aliens" counts!), apart from once - the day he became an elder he wanted to "Woohoo". It wasn't directed at anyone particular, it didn't last long, and it has never reappeared. Personally, I put it down to a brief intellectual curiosity about it, quickly replaced by a "nah, I've got lots of other things to do".

I also have a sim who I know is trans, but as yet hasn't really admitted it to themself, let alone telling anyone else or transitioning. I have a few bits and pieces downloaded for when they're ready.

For the general discussion: I have two real life small children, a boy and a girl (as far as we know). They've been teaching me that gendered preferences in clothing and/or toys is mostly rubbish - both children enjoy various things that are coded as "feminine" and various things that are coded as "masculine". About the only thing we've seen that does match gendered expectations is that as a toddler my son was much more interested in vehicles than people (the toy trains rarely had drivers), and my daughter prefers people to vehicles (time will be devoted to the train drivers walking around and hugging each other as well as driving the trains). But given my experience with everything else, I'm inclined to put that one down to different personalities rather than their gender. So enjoy the sims, and don't stress about what gender it's "supposed" to be for.

Or what age, or anything.

You should not, of course, do anything you're not comfortable with; but consider. Why is it embarrassing? What's the worst thing that will happen if someone finds out you play? How certain are you that no one you know, at all, is presently also playing one of the most popular vdeogames in the world? Why is it less embarrassing to play a game about imaginary street crime than a game about imaginary everyday life? What is there in this harmless pastime to be ashamed of? Are your friends, family, and co-workers really all so petty, so shallow, so mean that they would hurt your feelings over the thing you enjoy? If that's what you think of them, why are you even around them?

People who don't accept you aren't proper company for you. If they're not total jackasses, they accept you as you are. Furthermore, they may be encouraged to share with you some equally harmless thing about themselves that they've been hiding for exactly similar reasons, and you will know each other better and trust each other more.

So the upside of coming out as a Sims 2 players is far greater than the downside. It's not like coming out as trans or queer (or Jewish, alas), which may put your life in danger. Why not make your life larger and freer by being open about what you do? You don't have to go into detail about your vampire/werewolf/plantsim polycule and their alien triplets any more than you have to go into details about a game of pick-up basketball. It's just one of the things you do.

All of my Sims are cis and nobody is ace. I fully support transgender and ace real people (trans rights are human rights), but due to my generational playstyle, I've never consdered having an ace Sim. As for trans sims, IDK what being transgender would look like in a world without gender norms.

Warning personal non-sims stuff ahead

I don't think there's a male experience or a female experience in my personal game, and the prospect of someone feeling distinctly male or female without any external pressure from society is not something I understand enough to incorporate it into my game.

I'm a straight cis man that plays with a virtual dollhouse. I'm also a straight cis man that plays virtual street crime. I'm a straight cis man that will go to a Taylor Swift concert. I'm also a straight cis man that went to a Guns N' Roses concert. Everyone knows these things about me, I make no secret of it. Embrace the things you love! If someone belittles you for it, then you know that person isn't worth wasting your time and you're better off employing it somewhere else - like in your virtual dollhouse!

Anyway, my hood has a shortage of male sims somehow, for 1 or 2 generations now I have had a non-negligible surplus of female sims being born, so... Gay males are at a premium in this economy.